The address says alieseternalquestions. But I haven't asked any questions till now. Had a nice day today. Unexpectedly! The things i wanted to do never happened. And that leaves me a little worried. It's like you can't really plan anything in life isn't it? People sometimes just expect too much of you. Or is it that they know you better than you know yourself. I'm always afraid of saying things, lest someone might stumble on this and then they may want to know what i meant. then do I lie? I have to update the other blogs. Wanted to talk about Aly to someone. But then I can't do that can I? It's like expecting too much. It's now my problem I have to think about it mysefl. And then I wanted to call up Ash. And that didn't happen either. I hope he's ok. If i don't love him why would I get so worried abouthim. He would have told me if anything happened, right? Why am I saying this? He never says anything. I have to ask to find out. Why has it got to be me who's asking? Isn't anyone else wondering like me? There they gush out the numerous questions. I wanted to write something funny. Why funny? I'm not disguising my sadness, am I? Sadness. What is it? More like disappointment. What the hell is this I am saying? I know I keep saying that i shouldn't depend on others. She said she feels selfish to cry on my shoulder. but that isn't the problem. isaid that i feel wanted I feel needed. When will I feel like that with a boy? Someone who's more than a friend.
How do you expect me to show you what i fell about you? It's not fait. neither to you nor to him. Yet i can't afford to let you misunderstand. I wish I could be myself. Trapped and looking for new places to go to. Yet hoping the horrid lonliness doesn't follow. But then like a bloody shadow it keeps getting stuck to my heels. I think I've lost it. But then it was only a momentary patch of sunlight. Is it that cold places make you feel the frost more than ever? But here I can afford to show it. What if I go back, step into sunlight and then find that the shadow is now within me?
About Me
- Alison
- I'll tell u wot i like...sitting cuddled up in a corner in a big room, watching the rain come down in silvery strings on glossy leaves, the crash of thunder n the fire of lightening, the indescribable colour of sunrises and sunsets, playing with sand with my feet, walking on green grass, smelling freshly fried chapatties, touching freshly drained rice, the smell of coffee, the touch of the breeze, a softly spoken compliment, a kind word, an understanding smile, an encouraging pat, a reassuring hug. I love the sound of water, the dancing of flames, the screaming of the wind, the touch of the earth. I love the cooing of a baby, the smile of a child, the confiding touch of a toddler. I am just what you think of me when you get to know me.
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